An Ode To Trading

[Kai]

OK posting this before I start thinking it's too cringe or lame or whatever and change my mind! Perhaps a gust of poetic inspiration or a random scribble, either way it's inspired mostly by the Liverpool comeback and in part by Steve Burns as well

An Ode To Trading

Both You and I, Her and Him,
Everyone is a trader of sorts,
Follow your passions on a whim,
Before your perception distorts.

Trade away your precious time,
For a wage that is less than true,
'Tis almost a certain crime,
Devised for loyal assets like you.

Trade away what makes you happy,
For what makes you feel secure,
If it makes you bitter and snappy,
There is but one real cure.

Trade away your morals if you dare,
For a bargain and for easy coin,
Best to proceed with extreme care,
Lest you get kicked in the groin.

Trade risk for profit my brother,
And try to prove your mettle,
This ode is for you and not another,
Right or wrong the market will always settle.

[Trader Pat]

Good effort Kai but what percentage is plagiarised?!

[Derek27]

Are you going to sing it?

[Kai]

Good effort Kai but what percentage is plagiarised?!

Oh ye of little faith, I've not been so insulted since... well, since last thread!!!!!

But to answer your question I've dug up the quote that has been ingrained in my brain these last few years, since I'm bad at maths I can say by "this much", so like 90% but I already mentioned the famous trading poet that is Mr Burns beforehand



(btw writing in rhymes is fun, I think last time I did that was in high school trying to impress girls with dope hip hop lyrics since they had a thing for lyrical ganstas )

[Kai]

Are you going to sing it?

I'm glad you asked Derek! No.

Because I was hoping you or Minnie would, and then we just need a beat and we're ready for Eurovision 2022.

[Trader Pat]

Solid 6/10 effort... dock 4 points for the plagiarism

[Kai]

Solid 6/10 effort... dock 4 points for the plagiarism

Well that's terribly disappointing Trader Pat. I was hoping for at least 3 kudos comments and at least one BRAVO in all caps Besides, I already asked Google whether there's any money in poetry. NOPE.

[Derek27]

Are you going to sing it?

I'm glad you asked Derek! No.

Because I was hoping you or Minnie would, and then we just need a beat and we're ready for Eurovision 2022.

We'll work on a duet. Can't do any worse than James.

[wearthefoxhat]

I'll give it a try.

The click of a button gives me a sense of hope,
an entry pre-race, not too big to cope,
confidence builds to take on all-comers,
oh shite, got caught up in a trade with the mad bombers.

One more deposit it should be fine,
shall I make it, six, no let's go for nine,
nothing can stop me, I'll be back on course,
what's this? an email from betfair, my funds from which source?

Ok they accepted my BS, I think it's all passed,
Lets do inplay, bet angel's quite fast,
no software like it, not bad for an old codger,
beats that jet thing from dodgy ol' bodger.

I throw in a trade on the footy, the market is unders or over,
won't be long, until I'm in clover,
all things being equal, jeeze, they keep hitting the bar,
cmon man, now I've got to contend with blinking VAR.

Oh well, another bank is blown,
all my hopes and dreams, and fresh doubts are sown,
each way I turn, I end up on my ass,
wait, there's hope, it's Peters' masterclass.

[Kai]

I told you guys it was fun!

Nicely done Mr Fox, I enjoyed that

[Trader Pat]

8/10 for Mr Fox!

[The Silk Run]

Are you going to sing it?

I'm glad you asked Derek! No.

Because I was hoping you or Minnie would, and then we just need a beat and we're ready for Eurovision 2022.

I'm behaving myself this evening

[Derek27]

I'll give it a try.

The click of a button gives me a sense of hope,
an entry pre-race, not too big to cope,
confidence builds to take on all-comers,
oh shite, got caught up in a trade with the mad bombers.

One more deposit it should be fine,
shall I make it, six, no let's go for nine,
nothing can stop me, I'll be back on course,
what's this? an email from betfair, my funds from which source?

Ok they accepted my BS, I think it's all passed,
Lets do inplay, bet angel's quite fast,
no software like it, not bad for an old codger,
beats that jet thing from dodgy ol' bodger.

I throw in a trade on the footy, the market is unders or over,
won't be long, until I'm in clover,
all things being equal, jeeze, they keep hitting the bar,
cmon man, now I've got to contend with blinking VAR.

Oh well, another bank is blown,
all my hopes and dreams, and fresh doubts are sown,
each way I turn, I end up on my ass,
wait, there's hope, it's Peters' masterclass.

Excellent! When I read the first line I was singing it to the tune of Roland Keating: The smile on your face lets me know that you need me, but the rest didn't fit.

[Kai]

I'll give it a try.

The click of a button gives me a sense of hope,
an entry pre-race, not too big to cope,
confidence builds to take on all-comers,
oh shite, got caught up in a trade with the mad bombers.

One more deposit it should be fine,
shall I make it, six, no let's go for nine,
nothing can stop me, I'll be back on course,
what's this? an email from betfair, my funds from which source?

Ok they accepted my BS, I think it's all passed,
Lets do inplay, bet angel's quite fast,
no software like it, not bad for an old codger,
beats that jet thing from dodgy ol' bodger.

I throw in a trade on the footy, the market is unders or over,
won't be long, until I'm in clover,
all things being equal, jeeze, they keep hitting the bar,
cmon man, now I've got to contend with blinking VAR.

Oh well, another bank is blown,
all my hopes and dreams, and fresh doubts are sown,
each way I turn, I end up on my ass,
wait, there's hope, it's Peters' masterclass.

Excellent! When I read the first line I was singing it to the tune of Roland Keating: The smile on your face lets me know that you need me, but the rest didn't fit.

OK I'm not even gonna ask who the hell is Roland Keating.

But I actually read it in the voice of Eminem and it was quite good, like a freestyle rap Maybe Brits should try in the voice of Stormzy?

[Derek27]

OK I'm not even gonna ask who the hell is Roland Keating.

I'm not a great fan of Roland Keating and you've probably got different tastes in music, but this was brilliant to my ears.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IobNcpiwpSc

Don't blame you for not asking after you googled my Matt Handjob gag.