Where are all the jokes?

Relax and chat about anything not covered elsewhere.
Post Reply
sniffer66
Posts: 1666
Joined: Thu May 02, 2019 8:37 am

Derek27 wrote:
Sat Nov 20, 2021 8:39 pm
sniffer66 wrote:
Thu Nov 18, 2021 12:51 pm
"Dad, why is my sister called Teresa ?".

"Cos it's an anagram of Easter and your Mum loves Easter".

"Thanks Dad".

"No problem, Alan"
That was posted further down the thread. :)
So good they posted it twice ;)
Korattt
Posts: 2405
Joined: Mon Dec 21, 2015 6:46 pm

got banned from B&Q, today some dickhead in an orange apron came up to me and asked if I wanted decking!!

I got the first punch in
User avatar
ANGELS15
Posts: 844
Joined: Wed Mar 22, 2017 9:57 am

Korattt wrote:
Sun Nov 21, 2021 3:34 pm
got banned from B&Q, today some dickhead in an orange apron came up to me and asked if I wanted decking!!

I got the first punch in
:lol:
User avatar
Derek27
Posts: 23468
Joined: Wed Aug 30, 2017 11:44 am
Location: UK

What a stupid question from Kay Burley: Why is Priti Patel not a moron?

How can anyone answer that? :lol:
User avatar
paspuggie48
Posts: 611
Joined: Thu Jun 20, 2013 9:22 am
Location: South-West

I bought a dog from a blacksmith the other day.

As soon as I brought him home, he made a bolt for the door.
User avatar
Derek27
Posts: 23468
Joined: Wed Aug 30, 2017 11:44 am
Location: UK

paspuggie48 wrote:
Thu Nov 25, 2021 6:22 pm
I bought a dog from a blacksmith the other day.

As soon as I brought him home, he made a bolt for the door.
Good one, by your usual standards. ;)
User avatar
paspuggie48
Posts: 611
Joined: Thu Jun 20, 2013 9:22 am
Location: South-West

Derek27 wrote:
Thu Nov 25, 2021 9:57 pm
paspuggie48 wrote:
Thu Nov 25, 2021 6:22 pm
I bought a dog from a blacksmith the other day.

As soon as I brought him home, he made a bolt for the door.
Good one, by your usual standards. ;)
Now Now..cheeky !!!
greenmark
Posts: 4948
Joined: Mon Jan 29, 2018 2:15 pm

paspuggie48 wrote:
Fri Nov 26, 2021 2:59 pm
Derek27 wrote:
Thu Nov 25, 2021 9:57 pm
paspuggie48 wrote:
Thu Nov 25, 2021 6:22 pm
I bought a dog from a blacksmith the other day.

As soon as I brought him home, he made a bolt for the door.
Good one, by your usual standards. ;)
Now Now..cheeky !!!
Keep going paspuggie48.
All comedians dare to fail.
You're doing pretty well and have prodded other comics on here to entertain the rest of us.
I salute you! :-)
User avatar
paspuggie48
Posts: 611
Joined: Thu Jun 20, 2013 9:22 am
Location: South-West

greenmark wrote:
Fri Nov 26, 2021 4:05 pm
paspuggie48 wrote:
Fri Nov 26, 2021 2:59 pm
Derek27 wrote:
Thu Nov 25, 2021 9:57 pm


Good one, by your usual standards. ;)
Now Now..cheeky !!!
Keep going paspuggie48.
All comedians dare to fail.
You're doing pretty well and have prodded other comics on here to entertain the rest of us.
I salute you! :-)
:D :) ;)
User avatar
paspuggie48
Posts: 611
Joined: Thu Jun 20, 2013 9:22 am
Location: South-West

“Ok Fred, Velma & Daphne. Name one of the big five game animals in Africa.”

“Rhino.”

“I know you do Scooby, but it’s not your turn.”
Anbell
Posts: 2004
Joined: Fri Apr 05, 2019 2:31 am

paspuggie48 wrote:
Sat Nov 27, 2021 5:45 am
“Ok Fred, Velma & Daphne. Name one of the big five game animals in Africa.”

“Rhino.”

“I know you do Scooby, but it’s not your turn.”
oh dear
User avatar
paspuggie48
Posts: 611
Joined: Thu Jun 20, 2013 9:22 am
Location: South-West

If a woman says she'll be ready in 15 minutes, she will be.

No need to remind her every half hour !!
User avatar
paspuggie48
Posts: 611
Joined: Thu Jun 20, 2013 9:22 am
Location: South-West

Dad: It said on the news that an actress has stabbed someone. Think her name was Reese.

Mum: Witherspoon?

Dad: No, with a knife.
User avatar
wearthefoxhat
Posts: 3205
Joined: Sun Feb 18, 2018 9:55 am

I got my Viagra pills mixed up with my Valium pills. I've been up and down all night.
Galilee66
Posts: 222
Joined: Thu Apr 16, 2009 5:07 am

A man suffered serious burns to the front of his legs when his barbecue exploded and was taken to hospital for treatment. The doctor examined him and told the nurse to give him a dose of viagra. "Will that cure the burns?" asked the nurse. "No" replied the doctor, "But it will keep the sheets off his legs for a couple of hours."
Post Reply

Return to “Chill Out Area”