Where are all the jokes?

Relax and chat about anything not covered elsewhere.
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ghtrader
Posts: 2
Joined: Tue Aug 03, 2021 4:33 pm

When I worked at the UN I was asked to get Kofi Annan a gram of cocaine. A few hours later I returned and said "Kofi, the only one I can think of is oceanic"
Korattt
Posts: 2405
Joined: Mon Dec 21, 2015 6:46 pm

What do you call a magician who’s lost his magic?

Ian
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ANGELS15
Posts: 844
Joined: Wed Mar 22, 2017 9:57 am

A lorry load of tortoises collided with a van load of terrapins. It was a turtle disaster.
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ANGELS15
Posts: 844
Joined: Wed Mar 22, 2017 9:57 am

What did the cowboy say when he walked into a german car salesroom?

Audi!
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wearthefoxhat
Posts: 3206
Joined: Sun Feb 18, 2018 9:55 am

Thought I'd ask Chat GBT to come up with a joke...

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Derek27
Posts: 23477
Joined: Wed Aug 30, 2017 11:44 am
Location: UK

King Charles is spending Christmas in my home county. No wonder it's so difficult to buy eggs. :)
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Derek27
Posts: 23477
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Location: UK

Dentistry is so bad in the UK even King Charles can't see a dentist. He has to wait until 2023 to get a crown.
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Derek27
Posts: 23477
Joined: Wed Aug 30, 2017 11:44 am
Location: UK

If you don't like your neighbours you can download from YouTube and play an hour-long version of Rick Ashley's unforgettable (but only because it's repetitive) song and bugger off down the pub. :lol:

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Archangel
Posts: 1987
Joined: Thu Jun 27, 2013 3:03 pm
Location: Polo Lounge, Beverly Hills Hotel

Just found out my 84 year old neighbours on his own today so I’ve just been round and borrowed his chairs👍🏼
goldfinch77
Posts: 196
Joined: Wed Aug 05, 2020 11:45 am

The UN joke, brilliant,took me awhile though
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Derek27
Posts: 23477
Joined: Wed Aug 30, 2017 11:44 am
Location: UK

goldfinch77 wrote:
Sun Dec 25, 2022 4:52 pm
The UN joke, brilliant,took me awhile though
Well done, I still haven't got it. :)
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Kai
Posts: 6092
Joined: Tue Jan 20, 2015 12:21 pm

Derek27 wrote:
Sun Dec 25, 2022 8:11 pm
goldfinch77 wrote:
Sun Dec 25, 2022 4:52 pm
The UN joke, brilliant,took me awhile though
Well done, I still haven't got it. :)
There's also a shedload of mine that you still haven't got, damn you :)

But don't bother asking for clues, because I kant give you any!
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Derek27
Posts: 23477
Joined: Wed Aug 30, 2017 11:44 am
Location: UK

I've just downloaded 7-Zip. How the fuck do I open the zip file? :lol:
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Derek27
Posts: 23477
Joined: Wed Aug 30, 2017 11:44 am
Location: UK

A surgery in Doncaster sent all their patients a text message telling them they have "aggressive lung cancer with metastases" instead of a Merry Christmas message. :lol: :lol:
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ANGELS15
Posts: 844
Joined: Wed Mar 22, 2017 9:57 am

Derek27 wrote:
Sun Dec 25, 2022 8:11 pm
goldfinch77 wrote:
Sun Dec 25, 2022 4:52 pm
The UN joke, brilliant,took me awhile though
Well done, I still haven't got it. :)
+1 :?
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