Where are all the jokes?

[alexmr2]

https://youtu.be/mIiqHJQJh-E

[Galilee66]

A penguin walks into a bar and asks the barman, "Has my brother been in here tonight?" "I don't know," says the barman, "What does he look like?"

A kangaroo hops into a bar and aks for a beer. The bar owner was so confused by a talking kangaroo that he just plucked the firat price that came into his head and charged the kangaroo $20. He thought he would get the kangaroo talking while his assistant rang the TV station, so he said "Ahh, we don't get many langaroos in here." "I'm not surprised," replied the kangaroo, "At $20 a beer."

[gianni]

Whats the difference between a girl coming out from the church and a girl coming out of the bathroom?

One was praying to God while the other was praying to the porcelain god?

A girl coming out of the church has hope in her soul

[paspuggie48]

Whats the difference between a girl coming out from the church and a girl coming out of the bathroom?

One was praying to God while the other was praying to the porcelain god?

A girl coming out of the church has hope in her soul

Or she would like your 'soul' in her 'hope'

[alexmr2]

My grandad broke his back so we used a skateboard to help brace it and keep it straight

After that he went downhill fast


My dad gave me advice that when things get tough, you need to fight fire with fire

That's probably why he lost his job as a fireman

[wearthefoxhat]

When I buy a new TV, I always cover it in a thin layer of oil. I love it when there's a film on...

[sniffer66]

My old dad always said to me, "When one door closes, another one opens"

Great man my dad. Terrible cabinet maker though.

[paspuggie48]

My old dad always said to me, "When one door closes, another one opens"

Great man my dad. Terrible cabinet maker though.

My dad was great too, although he died a year ago... but I will always remember his last words...

"F*CK ME A BUS!!"

[jimibt]

My old dad always said to me, "When one door closes, another one opens"

Great man my dad. Terrible cabinet maker though.

My dad was great too, although he died a year ago... but I will always remember his last words...

"F*CK ME A BUS!!"

When I die, I want to die like my grandfather who died peacefully in his sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in his car..

[wearthefoxhat]

My friend just told me, "I hope you die in a deep hole filled with water."

I know he means well.

[paspuggie48]

My friend just told me, "I hope you die in a deep hole filled with water."

I know he means well.

Well, Well, Well the man said as he was falling down a 50ft hole !

[Galilee66]

My friend gave me a dictionary because he said it was no good. He said it had left out the word "gullible", but when I looked it up it was there!
G66

[wearthefoxhat]

I used to get teased at school because I bore a slight resemblance to a bowl of custard, luckily I had a thick skin.

[paspuggie48]

I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting larger. Then it hit me.

[paspuggie48]

Three guys go to a ski lodge, and there aren't enough rooms, so they have to share a bed. In the middle of the night, the guy on the right wakes up and says, "I had this wild, vivid dream of getting a hand job!" The guy on the left wakes up, and unbelievably, he's had the same dream, too. Then the guy in the middle wakes up and says, "That's funny, I dreamed I was skiing!"