RANT CORNER

[Kai]

Well now you simply have to share it, I'm sure the suspense is killing everyone, especially Peter and Euler.

Or do you want us to start taking wild guesses, because we can do that as well.

[Euler]

If it's a sponsored product or service endorsement, I don't do them. For obvious reasons.

I'd only consider that if I didn't trade anymore and needed to scrape the bottom of the barrel to get an income.

[firlandsfarm]

Kai ... many these days wouldn't appreciate the subtlety of the phone being the wrong way up!!

[Derek27]

I've been searching the internet for a local cleaner as I'm struggling to find the time to keep on top of the housework. Every cleaner advertises her skills and experience of cleaning but not a single one publishes a photograph of herself!

[Kafkaesque]

I've been searching the internet for a local cleaner as I'm struggling to find the time to keep on top of the housework. Every cleaner advertises her skills and experience of cleaning but not a single one publishes a photograph of herself!

My Spider-senses are tingling. All the way from Croatia to Denmark, I can feel Kai going, Oh come on man! I'm trying to be somewhat serious in this of all places.

There's so many meme's waiting on that one

How is a photo relevant for that job?

These will be provide photos I'm sure:

https://www.naturistcleaners.co.uk/

[Kai]

I've been searching the internet for a local cleaner as I'm struggling to find the time to keep on top of the housework. Every cleaner advertises her skills and experience of cleaning but not a single one publishes a photograph of herself!

My Spider-senses are tingling. All the way from Croatia to Denmark, I can feel Kai going, Oh come on man! I'm trying to be somewhat serious in this of all places.

There's so many meme's waiting on that one

How is a photo relevant for that job?

These will be provide photos I'm sure:

https://www.naturistcleaners.co.uk/

Is that... an actual thing? I've been living in the wrong flippin' country all me loife!

That's also the nastiest thing you've ever posted Kaf, but I like how they also offer a service with a clothed cleaner whilst you can be fully nude.

[Derek27]

I knew that sort of service exists in the US (what doesn't) but wasn't aware it was here. Sounds quite dangerous to me, with all the weirdos and perverts around.

[Kai]

I knew that sort of service exists in the US (what doesn't) but wasn't aware it was here. Sounds quite dangerous to me, with all the weirdos and perverts around.

You already booked an appointment, didn't you? That's fine, just try not to make too big of a mess soon as they leave.

I can already see your next 2 rants :

"FFS don't they have any cleaners younger than 40, how hard is to employ some younger people in this flippin' crisis "

and

"FFS they showed up 2 hours later than they were supposed to!! How am I supposed to focus on trading now, every flippin' bet I place goes straight into red "

[Kafkaesque]

Is that... an actual thing? I've been living in the wrong flippin' country all me loife!

That's also the nastiest thing you've ever posted Kaf, but I like how they also offer a service with a clothed cleaner whilst you can be fully nude.

In my defense, I got the notion that it's a thing from a (semi-)serious source in the form of QI.

I knew that sort of service exists in the US (what doesn't) but wasn't aware it was here. Sounds quite dangerous to me, with all the weirdos and perverts around.

You already booked an appointment, didn't you? That's fine, just try not to make too big of a mess soon as they leave.

I can already see your next 2 rants :

"FFS don't they have any cleaners younger than 40, how hard is to employ some younger people in this flippin' crisis "

and

"FFS they showed up 2 hours later than they were supposed to!! How am I supposed to focus on trading now, every flippin' bet I place goes straight into red "

Had a quick look around. Favourite bit is that an actual question in the FAQ is "Can I touch the cleaner?" I mean, how can you not just love it something silly, if that needs to be adressed

[Derek27]

Had a quick look around. Favourite bit is that an actual question in the FAQ is "Can I touch the cleaner?" I mean, how can you not just love it something silly, if that needs to be adressed

I noticed that. I was looking for the question: Is it okay to watch the cleaner or do I have to get on with whatever I'm doing?

For a minimum price of £120 for a nude cleaner or £80 for a fully clothed cleaner, it wouldn't cost much more to hire an escort for an hour.

By the way, don't get naturists and naturalists confused, it's a very easy mistake to make.

[firlandsfarm]

For a minimum price of £120 for a nude cleaner or £80 for a fully clothed cleaner, it wouldn't cost much more to hire an escort for an hour.

Good to see it's not just Betfair prices that you keep on top of!!

[Kai]

By the way, don't get naturists and naturalists confused, it's a very easy mistake to make.

How do you know that Derek, did you hire a naturalist by accident expecting her to strip down but was surprised when she started giving lessons on art and literature?

[Derek27]

By the way, don't get naturists and naturalists confused, it's a very easy mistake to make.

How do you know that Derek, did you hire a naturalist by accident expecting her to strip down but was surprised when she started giving lessons on art and literature?

I embarrassed myself at a family dinner when I called David Attenborough a naturist.

[Korattt]

1. can someone please tell me why don’t people indicate at roundabouts anymore?, 2. why do cyclists on pavements wear helmets?
3. why do couriers knock on the door when you’re on the loo?
4. why does the cat do his business in the litter tray when you’re eating?
5. when there’s no answer when you knock on the door when you have a parcel for them, you pop a “sorry you were out card” through the letterbox only for them to answer the door?
6. the landline rings when you’re upstairs only for the frigging thing to stop once you’ve nigh on broken your neck to get down the stairs to answer it?

.. more to follow I’m sure

[Korattt]

For a minimum price of £120 for a nude cleaner or £80 for a fully clothed cleaner, it wouldn't cost much more to hire an escort for an hour.

59E9CD87-9005-4A6B-A1EB-7DD4E12CB5E1.jpeg

.. wasn’t you was it Degsy?