Where are all the jokes?

Relax and chat about anything not covered elsewhere.
Post Reply
User avatar
Derek27
Posts: 23477
Joined: Wed Aug 30, 2017 11:44 am
Location: UK

The East of England Ambulance Service spent £54 million on a fleet of Fiat Ambulances that can't be driven by anyone over 5 feet 9 inches. :lol: :lol:
User avatar
Kai
Posts: 6092
Joined: Tue Jan 20, 2015 12:21 pm

Women are funny like that, amirite lads

Image
sniffer66
Posts: 1666
Joined: Thu May 02, 2019 8:37 am

Derek27 wrote:
Mon Jun 20, 2022 6:41 pm
The East of England Ambulance Service spent £54 million on a fleet of Fiat Ambulances that can't be driven by anyone over 5 feet 9 inches. :lol: :lol:
So, if I had an accident 4 feet away from A&E I'd be OK ?
User avatar
alexmr2
Posts: 766
Joined: Wed Sep 26, 2018 12:32 am

Derek27 wrote:
Sun Jun 19, 2022 7:24 pm
If Putin decides to push the button millions of Russians will invade heaven. God's applied to join NATO.
So you are saying all Russians go to heaven instead of hell when they crossover because they are all good? I don't think it's as simple as stored value nationality = Russian OR Ukranian = 1 (allowed in) as a blanket fixed rule. There has to be more conditions or perceptual judgement.

I'm sure God accounted for the possibility of lots of people going up the ladder and crossing over the crossover and designed the entry system to deal with a large volume of souls entering the afterlife at the same time. I'm sure they have developed automation or at least semi-automation by this point.

Also when Russians or Ukranian soldiers crossover into heaven I doubt their weapons will respawn with them, so it will be hard for them to to overthrow the angels unarmed in heaven which probably have their own weapons or bots to help them.

A bigger concern for me would be if Bill Gates gets into heaven.
User avatar
Hepburn
Posts: 173
Joined: Sun Feb 25, 2018 11:58 pm

Kai wrote:
Wed Jun 22, 2022 4:58 pm
Women are funny like that, amirite lads

Image
1625040657730.jpeg
You do not have the required permissions to view the files attached to this post.
sniffer66
Posts: 1666
Joined: Thu May 02, 2019 8:37 am

The pedant in me is desperately trying to type "You're".

Or ask, "My sexist what ?"
User avatar
Derek27
Posts: 23477
Joined: Wed Aug 30, 2017 11:44 am
Location: UK

alexmr2 wrote:
Wed Jun 22, 2022 5:32 pm
Derek27 wrote:
Sun Jun 19, 2022 7:24 pm
If Putin decides to push the button millions of Russians will invade heaven. God's applied to join NATO.
So you are saying all Russians go to heaven instead of hell when they crossover because they are all good? I don't think it's as simple as stored value nationality = Russian OR Ukranian = 1 (allowed in) as a blanket fixed rule. There has to be more conditions or perceptual judgement.

I'm sure God accounted for the possibility of lots of people going up the ladder and crossing over the crossover and designed the entry system to deal with a large volume of souls entering the afterlife at the same time. I'm sure they have developed automation or at least semi-automation by this point.

Also when Russians or Ukranian soldiers crossover into heaven I doubt their weapons will respawn with them, so it will be hard for them to to overthrow the angels unarmed in heaven which probably have their own weapons or bots to help them.

A bigger concern for me would be if Bill Gates gets into heaven.
Just a reminder Alex, this is the jokes thread.
User avatar
Kai
Posts: 6092
Joined: Tue Jan 20, 2015 12:21 pm

Hepburn wrote:
Wed Jun 22, 2022 5:44 pm
Kai wrote:
Wed Jun 22, 2022 4:58 pm
Women are funny like that, amirite lads

Image
1625040657730.jpeg
Men are funny like that, amirite girls

Image

#equality #ronburgundy
User avatar
alexmr2
Posts: 766
Joined: Wed Sep 26, 2018 12:32 am

Kai wrote:
Wed Jun 22, 2022 11:37 pm
Hepburn wrote:
Wed Jun 22, 2022 5:44 pm
Kai wrote:
Wed Jun 22, 2022 4:58 pm
Women are funny like that, amirite lads

Image
1625040657730.jpeg
Men are funny like that, amirite girls

Image

#equality #ronburgundy
Shaun has a mansion with a garden so big he needs a digger to make a new pond - took 0 photos

Derek drives to the country club in a Range Rover to play golf and drink champagne with the local judges and councillors - took 0 photos

Peter has a Lamborghini Aventador in his garage - took 0 photos

Course seller trader went to the swimming pool on holiday - took 14 photos

... then ordered a steak and took 9 photos
User avatar
Hepburn
Posts: 173
Joined: Sun Feb 25, 2018 11:58 pm

Anyone want to buy a broken barometer?

No pressure.
User avatar
Derek27
Posts: 23477
Joined: Wed Aug 30, 2017 11:44 am
Location: UK

I thought of something nice to say about Boris Johnson - he's not as odious as Trump. :lol:
User avatar
Kai
Posts: 6092
Joined: Tue Jan 20, 2015 12:21 pm

What do we want? Time travel.

When do we want it? Irrelevant.
User avatar
jimibt
Posts: 3641
Joined: Mon Nov 30, 2015 6:42 pm
Location: Narnia

for those of a certain *generation* :D
deja-vu.PNG
You do not have the required permissions to view the files attached to this post.
User avatar
Euler
Posts: 24701
Joined: Wed Nov 10, 2010 1:39 pm
Location: Bet Angel HQ

Never marry a tennis fan. Love means nothing to them.
User avatar
wearthefoxhat
Posts: 3206
Joined: Sun Feb 18, 2018 9:55 am

My first alcoholics anonymous meeting last night was rather depressing. I left with very sobering thoughts.
Post Reply

Return to “Chill Out Area”