Where are all the jokes?

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Derek27
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Inspector of Prisons reports prisons are infested with rats and cockroaches. Disgraceful way for the Inspector of Prisons to refer to inmates!
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conduirez
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Derek27 wrote:
Wed Feb 14, 2024 3:26 pm
Inspector of Prisons reports prisons are infested with rats and cockroaches. Disgraceful way for the Inspector of Prisons to refer to inmates!
He was not referring to inmates, he was referring to the guards, he called the inmates something far worse. :lol:
greenmark
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Where are all the jokes? Seems the point of this thread has been lost.
But I'm grumpy. Had 2 eggs for breakfast, but one egg is un oeuf.
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Derek27
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BREAKING NEWS: Shadow Defence Secretary, John Healey, admits the Labour Party are not all saints. :lol: :lol:
greenmark
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Derek27 wrote:
Wed Feb 14, 2024 5:24 pm
BREAKING NEWS: Shadow Defence Secretary, John Healey, admits the Labour Party are not all saints. :lol: :lol:
OMG that's Soooooo funny!!! Derek, find a joke and keep your political opinions to political threads.
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Derek27
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greenmark wrote:
Wed Feb 14, 2024 5:43 pm
Derek27 wrote:
Wed Feb 14, 2024 5:24 pm
BREAKING NEWS: Shadow Defence Secretary, John Healey, admits the Labour Party are not all saints. :lol: :lol:
OMG that's Soooooo funny!!! Derek, find a joke and keep your political opinions to political threads.
How does that amount to a political opinion? What opinion am I conveying?
greenmark
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Derek27 wrote:
Wed Feb 14, 2024 6:02 pm
greenmark wrote:
Wed Feb 14, 2024 5:43 pm
Derek27 wrote:
Wed Feb 14, 2024 5:24 pm
BREAKING NEWS: Shadow Defence Secretary, John Healey, admits the Labour Party are not all saints. :lol: :lol:
OMG that's Soooooo funny!!! Derek, find a joke and keep your political opinions to political threads.
How does that amount to a political opinion? What opinion am I conveying?
Certainly not conveying a joke.
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Derek27
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greenmark wrote:
Wed Feb 14, 2024 6:42 pm
Derek27 wrote:
Wed Feb 14, 2024 6:02 pm
greenmark wrote:
Wed Feb 14, 2024 5:43 pm


OMG that's Soooooo funny!!! Derek, find a joke and keep your political opinions to political threads.
How does that amount to a political opinion? What opinion am I conveying?
Certainly not conveying a joke.
It's a type of, is the Pope a Catholic joke.
greenmark
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Derek27 wrote:
Wed Feb 14, 2024 7:23 pm
greenmark wrote:
Wed Feb 14, 2024 6:42 pm
Derek27 wrote:
Wed Feb 14, 2024 6:02 pm


How does that amount to a political opinion? What opinion am I conveying?
Certainly not conveying a joke.
It's a type of, is the Pope a Catholic joke.
My apologies. I get it now. Still a bit too politcal and cryptic for me. The joke is there but the revelation takes explanation, which kind of knackers it as a joke. Try that in a stand-up and the tumbleweeds would roll by.
Sadly I'm rubbish at remembering jokes so can't complain.
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Kai
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greenmark wrote:
Wed Feb 14, 2024 6:42 pm
Derek27 wrote:
Wed Feb 14, 2024 6:02 pm
greenmark wrote:
Wed Feb 14, 2024 5:43 pm


OMG that's Soooooo funny!!! Derek, find a joke and keep your political opinions to political threads.
How does that amount to a political opinion? What opinion am I conveying?
Certainly not conveying a joke.
Geez, tough crowd

I sympathize with Derek, sometimes the joke is all about making oneself laugh :)

While sometimes jokes, much like trading ideas, sound way better in your head
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Derek27
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Kai wrote:
Thu Feb 15, 2024 10:49 pm
greenmark wrote:
Wed Feb 14, 2024 6:42 pm
Derek27 wrote:
Wed Feb 14, 2024 6:02 pm


How does that amount to a political opinion? What opinion am I conveying?
Certainly not conveying a joke.
Geez, tough crowd

I sympathize with Derek, sometimes the joke is all about making oneself laugh :)

While sometimes jokes, much like trading ideas, sound way better in your head
If a joke makes oneself laugh, it's still a joke. :mrgreen:

How many of these jokes do you think have been written?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qklvh5Cp_Bs
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Derek27
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10% of all road accidents are caused by drunk drivers. Why don't sober drivers stay off the flipping road and reduce accidents by 90%? :mrgreen:
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Derek27
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Putin has just bought FC Spartak Moscow. Fans who turn up to their matches supporting, waving banners or wearing the colours of the opposition will now be arrested.
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Derek27
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A man dies and goes to hell. As he comes around, confused and dazed, he calls out, "What time is it?".

"Half past ten", said a big man standing over him, bright red eyes, twin horns in his head and a pitchfork in his right hand.

The dead man looks up and asks, "Are you Satan?".

"Absolutely positive", he replies.
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Derek27
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A man dies and goes to heaven. At the entrance, St. Peter shows him a map of heaven. He sees an area where the Jews live, next door to the Muslims, with whom they live peacefully as neighbours. Then he sees an area for the Hindus, Sikhs, Buddhists, Anglicans, Baptists, Protestants, just about every religion you can think off.

Then he notices the Catholics are segregated on an island far away from the heaven mainland. He asks St. Peter, "Why are the Catholics separated and so far away?".

St. Peter replies, "They like to think they're the only ones here." :)
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