Where are all the jokes?
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Realrocknrolla
- Posts: 1903
- Joined: Fri Jun 05, 2020 7:15 pm
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lol -so true i'd bet...
There was 3 lunatics in a lunatic asylum .. the governor calls them in the office one by one ..
gov says right im letting you out for 2 weeks and i want you to find out all you can about spiders ..
and if you answer my questions correct you can go free
so they all go out and come back after 2 weeks .. 1st lunatic goes in the office .. gov says what you learned
Spiders spin webs he replied ... very good says the gov off you go have a great life
2nd lunatic goes in, Gov says ok what you learned , he replies they have 8 legs ... very good says gov off you go have a great life .
3rd lunatic goes in ,Gov says what you learned , he replies watch this , the lunatic puts the spider at the end of the table,
holds his hand out shouts come on Boris and the little spider runs along the table jumps onto the lunatics hand ,
Gov says that doesnt prove anything , so the lunatic places the spider at the end of the table pulls all its legs off
and shouts come on Boris but the spider makes no move ... the Gov says what does this prove ...
The lunatic says spiders go deaf when you pull all their legs off
gov says right im letting you out for 2 weeks and i want you to find out all you can about spiders ..
and if you answer my questions correct you can go free
so they all go out and come back after 2 weeks .. 1st lunatic goes in the office .. gov says what you learned
Spiders spin webs he replied ... very good says the gov off you go have a great life
2nd lunatic goes in, Gov says ok what you learned , he replies they have 8 legs ... very good says gov off you go have a great life .
3rd lunatic goes in ,Gov says what you learned , he replies watch this , the lunatic puts the spider at the end of the table,
holds his hand out shouts come on Boris and the little spider runs along the table jumps onto the lunatics hand ,
Gov says that doesnt prove anything , so the lunatic places the spider at the end of the table pulls all its legs off
and shouts come on Boris but the spider makes no move ... the Gov says what does this prove ...
The lunatic says spiders go deaf when you pull all their legs off
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wearthefoxhat
- Posts: 3221
- Joined: Sun Feb 18, 2018 9:55 am
Tough times. I've just heard my local Origami business has folded.
Three monkeys escape from a scientific research laboratory. After a day walking they decide to split up. The first monkey says "I'm having a night on the town". The second monkey says "I'm gonna find a woodland to live in". The third monkey says "I'm going back to the laboratory".
"What you're doing that for you idiot?", says the other two monkeys.
"I haven't had a fag all day".
"What you're doing that for you idiot?", says the other two monkeys.
"I haven't had a fag all day".
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wearthefoxhat
- Posts: 3221
- Joined: Sun Feb 18, 2018 9:55 am
I fell into a vat of invisible ink today. I'm now in hospital waiting to be seen.
The parts of the body held a meeting one day to decide which should be boss. The brain spoke first and said it should as it did all the thinking. The eyes said it should be boss as it did all the seeing. They argued for a while and then suddenly a little voice piped up at the back and said 'I should be boss'. They all looked in surprise as it was the arsehole who had spoken. They all laughed at the idea of the arsehole being boss. The arsehole was angry and clammed up. After a few days the brain grew foggy, the eyes misty, the guts were in turmoil and everyone pleaded with the brain to let the arsehole be boss. The motto you don't have to be brains to be boss just an arsehole.