Trading Anger Management

[rhysmr2]

adopt the any green will do mentality and grow back gently to larger once the cheltenhams and ascots arrive.

Good idea!

Jeff, Thanks for that great reply, it all sounds spot on. Now the hard part is going to be putting this to practice!

Perhaps your desperation to pull in big figures is being driven by increased responsibilities in your private life?

Very true, my trading went from great to bad the same week I purchased my first house (140k), coincidence?!

Although I've always been desperate to make big money, Everything I want costs a lot!

I will try my hardest to use small stakes till I get back in the swing of things, things have to change now. Thanks again.

[to75ne]

rhysmr2.

personally i really think you need a break.

i think that you are maybe a bit jaded and need a week or two away. if you had a "proper job",
no doubt you would take leave to go on holiday, nip of to the coast on bank holidays etc.

i suspect you trade most if not everyday. like any job, everyone needs to get away from it all for good chunk of time.

as you have just bought your house (congratulations), why not take some time of to decorate, buy curtains etc. take your mind away from pre horse trading. dont trade the sandbaggers in the evening instead look into some of the suggestions people have made, ie nlp, meditation etc, read the book.

thats my take on things, i really think you are suffering battle fatigue, and need a two week holiday, get away from work.

[danum]

Sorry to hear of your current troubles Rhys, I can empathise with what you're going through. My trading was going along nicely with profits progressing slowly and consistently and then it all came crashing down in December. I had been planning an overseas trip for a while and paid on my credit card with the intention of drawing funds from BF to cover the cost. I had enough to pay for the trip with some leftover but stupidly I decided to try and make enough in the month leading up to Christmas to leave me with the same bank I had at that time. Overnight my attitude to risk increased, I followed my strategy when it worked but refused to when things went against me and did stupid things to try and make it back. I managed to lose my entire bank inside 3 weeks, thousands!

I decided to stop trading completely until after my holiday, I am just getting back into things now but with small stakes and no expectations at all; just my strategy which I follow no matter what.

This has taught me that I couldn't handle the expectation I had placed on myself, instead of trying to be emotionless in my trades I was mentally trading with my holiday fund. Maybe a way forward for you is to ringfence what you need to cover your fixed costs and only trade with what's left over, that way you can detach any fear you have of losing because it doesn't represent the gas bill, the mortgage, food for the week etc

You can do it, you just need to take control of the situation and find a new strategy to manage yourself.

All the best.
Dan

[Yantraman]

Sorry forgot to explain NLP- "Neuro Linguistic Programming"

I once saw an episode of Derren Brown where he was able to change the colour perspective of a complete stranger.

She saw yellow as red and red as yellow. She couldnt even identify her own red car in the car park! From what I understand he used NLP to do this.

By the way I've just had the crapest month for ages, Jan/Feb was tough last year as well, I seem more relaxed about it though - maybe because I am just resigned to it being like this at this time of year.

[Iron]

Something to remember about Brown is that alot of what he does is, by his own admission, simple magic of the Paul Daniels variety.

When he pretends to read someone's mind, for example, he can't tell the word they're thinking just be looking at the direction in which their eyes are moving. Instead, he does what people do who claim to communicate with the dead, and lets the other person lead him, eg 'A name is coming to me. I think it begins with J. Do you know a John? A Jane? Oh, your aunt was called Jane, you say?'.

But that's not to dismiss NLP (although I do think some of its ideas are frankly batty!). Lots of NLP makes sense (although it's just common sense repackaged IMHO). Probably the most famous NLP practitioner is a guy called Tony Robbins. If you Google him, you'll find loads of his recordings online (and you might also like this one: viewtopic.php?f=18&t=3024).

Jeff

Sorry forgot to explain NLP- "Neuro Linguistic Programming"

I once saw an episode of Derren Brown where he was able to change the colour perspective of a complete stranger.

She saw yellow as red and red as yellow. She couldnt even identify her own red car in the car park! From what I understand he used NLP to do this.

[Iron]

Good idea!

Jeff, Thanks for that great reply, it all sounds spot on. Now the hard part is going to be putting this to practice!

No worries Rhysmr -

It actually made me reflect on my own situation (which is similar in some respects, although I've never been on anything like 1K per week!).

So if I can take my own advice (something people are bad at in my experience!), this discussion might prove useful to me too!

Jeff

[oddstrader]

the nice thing about this thread is seeing the camraderie and support

[Yantraman]

Yes quite - but what Derren Brown really proves is that it is possible to change the minds perspective using techniques such as suggestion. NLP is effective because many of our emotions are linked to an association with a previous event or a fear of what might happen. NLP can help to unlink unwanted associations.

Its not as way out as some make it out to be.

It is something that the brain can be seen doing naturally anyway (a skydiver wont be as fearful on his 10th jump as he was on his first).

[Iron]

Hi Yantraman

I agree - although (on a pedantic note) I think those techniques predated NLP.

If a particular memory distresses you, you might want to try imagining it on a small screen in black and white. Then shink the screen, and stand back. Play the scene back and forth a few times, with some silly music in the background. I think there's a chance that your association will have changed at the end of the exercise.

Psychoanalysis is about getting to the route of the problem. NLP takes the view that the cause of the disease isn't important - what matters is the cure!

Paul McKenna's books are good for those kind of techniques.

Jeff

It is something that the brain can be seen doing naturally anyway (a skydiver wont be as fearful on his 10th jump as he was on his first).

[PeterLe]

Re the Posts about NLP
Working for large American corporations,I've come across this over the years.
On one course many years ago we were being taught how to present to large audiences. Anyone who has done this will tell you that at the beginning it is quite terrifying. One NLP technique I was taught was called anchoring. You can use it is any scenario, from chatting up girls(!), well to anything really.
I was taught it on an advanced presentations course
You think of a time when you gave a great presentation and you anchor that feeling you had at the time to a body gesture (in my case I chose to touch my left index finger with my left thumb).
Next time you are in the middle of a large presentation you touch the two fingers and the feelings that you have anchored or associated will return and make it easier for you. (Basically)
I taught both my son and daughter this technique when they were faced with interviews.
Does It work?? Dont know; but half the battle is thinking it does...(the mind is very powerful; look at Pavlows dog!, or the feelings you get when you know the girlfriend is coming over tonight!)..

Could you use this technique with trading? Probably. For example everytime you make a successful trade you cold anchor that feeling to some gesture and use it to counteract a bad trade.

The problem is; when you do something good, you probably only tell yourself once..but do something bad and you re live it many times, for EG, imagine if you were carrying a lunch tray across a crowded restaurant,...and you dropped it and everyone looked. You wouldnt just drop it once in you mind, you would probably drop it a dozen times as you would be saying to yourself "What a dic*, I cant believe I dropped that" as you walked back to your table..

Its just about swinging the balance back towards positive thoughts rather than focusing on the negative

regards
Peter

[Iron]

Hi Peter

Do you find that the mere act of touching those fingers together triggers certain emotions? Or does there need to be a conscious intent there too?

I believe it's also possible to will yourself into an emotional state. It's what method actors do when they're playing a part - they imagine that they are the person they're playing.

When I worked in telesales years ago, a colleague advised me to imagine when ringing up a customer that I'd just won the lottery. Perhaps the same technique can be applied to going red. If you imagine you're fabulously wealthy, you probably won't be bothered about losing 6 ticks due to an unexpected spike!

You mention chatting up women. Years ago, a friend of mine told me that saying to himself 'I am BIG!' before he went out on the town made him feel sexually confident!

I agree with you about negative thinking. I think that's why meditation can help with trading - it helps you clear your mind of the rubbish that gets in the way of clear and confident thinking.

Jeff

Re the Posts about NLP
Working for large American corporations,I've come across this over the years.
On one course many years ago we were being taught how to present to large audiences. Anyone who has done this will tell you that at the beginning it is quite terrifying. One NLP technique I was taught was called anchoring. You can use it is any scenario, from chatting up girls(!), well to anything really.
I was taught it on an advanced presentations course
You think of a time when you gave a great presentation and you anchor that feeling you had at the time to a body gesture (in my case I chose to touch my left index finger with my left thumb).
Next time you are in the middle of a large presentation you touch the two fingers and the feelings that you have anchored or associated will return and make it easier for you. (Basically)
I taught both my son and daughter this technique when they were faced with interviews.
Does It work?? Dont know; but half the battle is thinking it does...(the mind is very powerful; look at Pavlows dog!, or the feelings you get when you know the girlfriend is coming over tonight!)..

Could you use this technique with trading? Probably. For example everytime you make a successful trade you cold anchor that feeling to some gesture and use it to counteract a bad trade.

The problem is; when you do something good, you probably only tell yourself once..but do something bad and you re live it many times, for EG, imagine if you were carrying a lunch tray across a crowded restaurant,...and you dropped it and everyone looked. You wouldnt just drop it once in you mind, you would probably drop it a dozen times as you would be saying to yourself "What a dic*, I cant believe I dropped that" as you walked back to your table..

Its just about swinging the balance back towards positive thoughts rather than focusing on the negative

regards
Peter

[Backpalm]

Ego is the worst trader's enemy, humility the best weapon.

Trade like a robot, not like an human being and keep you ego away from the game.


Excuse my english.

Greetings.

[Predicton]

Hi all,

it isn't that many years ago that "positive visualisation" was all the rage in sports (I seem to remember Tony Adams being an advocate). I'm not sure whether it's still popular but it sounds very similar to the technique Peter used, which, incidentally I could have done with when facing residents from two hundred properties which had been flooded to a depth of three feet, in 2000, at a public meeting.

Interesting idea,

cheers, P

[Iron]

I take it simply blaming God would not have been an option?

Jeff

Hi all,

it isn't that many years ago that "positive visualisation" was all the rage in sports (I seem to remember Tony Adams being an advocate). I'm not sure whether it's still popular but it sounds very similar to the technique Peter used, which, incidentally I could have done with when facing residents from two hundred properties which had been flooded to a depth of three feet, in 2000, at a public meeting.

Interesting idea,

cheers, P

[Predicton]

Lol,

no Jeff, they wanted somebody's head