buzzkill!! - oh and santa ain't real
My Apologies
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SweetLyrics
- Posts: 207
- Joined: Sat Jun 16, 2018 7:57 pm
In an ideal world, if someone aggressively called you a 'serial loser', you'd think, 'Is there any truth in that?. If yes, great, this guy has given me a valuable insight into myself (and has been far more honest than a friend would dare to be). I can use this information to become more successful. And if no, hey, no harm done.'
And if someone implied you were Islamophobic and, instead of apologising, made regular jibes over the next few years, you'd think 'Meh! Who cares what this random stranger thinks? I don't know the guy, but I hope he overcomes whatever demons are causing this strange behaviour!' and not give it a further thought.
However, we don't live in an ideal world. We live in a world full of sensitive human beings who aren't all great at handling unpleasantness that's directed at them. It's not a conscious choice, it's just the way people are wired, and not something people need to be criticised for (unless you have any practical suggestions on how people can toughen up?).
Jeff
And if someone implied you were Islamophobic and, instead of apologising, made regular jibes over the next few years, you'd think 'Meh! Who cares what this random stranger thinks? I don't know the guy, but I hope he overcomes whatever demons are causing this strange behaviour!' and not give it a further thought.
However, we don't live in an ideal world. We live in a world full of sensitive human beings who aren't all great at handling unpleasantness that's directed at them. It's not a conscious choice, it's just the way people are wired, and not something people need to be criticised for (unless you have any practical suggestions on how people can toughen up?).
Jeff
Jeff that looks like a bit of a heavy subject here in Tuco's birthday thread
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SweetLyrics
- Posts: 207
- Joined: Sat Jun 16, 2018 7:57 pm
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Trader Pat
- Posts: 4327
- Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2016 12:50 pm
Jeff I think you were on the forum long before I was so I don't know the history of what beefs you've had and with who and of course context is very important when judging the comments above but if people were saying stuff like that to me I would probably just ignore them. There are people on the forum I won't engage with just because I now how the conversations will end up, and I couldn't be bothered with never ending debates that go nowhere.SweetLyrics wrote: ↑Wed Jan 20, 2021 7:14 pmIn an ideal world, if someone aggressively called you a 'serial loser', you'd think, 'Is there any truth in that?. If yes, great, this guy has given me a valuable insight into myself (and has been far more honest than a friend would dare to be). I can use this information to become more successful. And if no, hey, no harm done.'
And if someone implied you were Islamophobic and, instead of apologising, made regular jibes over the next few years, you'd think 'Meh! Who cares what this random stranger thinks? I don't know the guy, but I hope he overcomes whatever demons are causing this strange behaviour!' and not give it a further thought.
Me and James have disagreed on quite a bit but I think we can find common ground on a lot of stuff and for the most part I enjoy our interactions, and that goes for most people on the forum who have a different perspective on life than I do. For the most part we're a bunch pf people on a forum who don't know each other and don't really know anything about each other. The type of person we believe each other is, is probably nothing like how we are in real life.
I have to say though this is pretty weak. You want people moderated and spoken to for saying 'what a stupid comment'? If that's the bar that you want moderation set at then there would be no debates at all on the forum.SweetLyrics wrote: ↑Wed Jan 20, 2021 4:42 pmIf someone makes a nasty comment about another forumite, or says something unpleasant like 'what a stupid comment', I think it would be good if the comment were to be deleted and the offender spoken to.
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SweetLyrics
- Posts: 207
- Joined: Sat Jun 16, 2018 7:57 pm
If a colleague at work made a suggestion that you disagreed with, would you say 'what a stupid comment'?
If you would, then you must work in a place where people are allowed to be disrespectful to each other. That kind of rude, condescending behaviour wouldn't be tolerated in most places I've worked. It's totally unnecessary.
Why not simply explore the issues in a climate of respect? Is it really asking that much?
If you would, then you must work in a place where people are allowed to be disrespectful to each other. That kind of rude, condescending behaviour wouldn't be tolerated in most places I've worked. It's totally unnecessary.
Why not simply explore the issues in a climate of respect? Is it really asking that much?
Trader Pat wrote: ↑Wed Jan 20, 2021 7:39 pmI have to say though this is pretty weak. You want people moderated and spoken to for saying 'what a stupid comment'? If that's the bar that you want moderation set at then there would be no debates at all on the forum.SweetLyrics wrote: ↑Wed Jan 20, 2021 4:42 pmIf someone makes a nasty comment about another forumite, or says something unpleasant like 'what a stupid comment', I think it would be good if the comment were to be deleted and the offender spoken to.
Jeff, what abuse precisely do you feel you've been subjected to?SweetLyrics wrote: ↑Wed Jan 20, 2021 7:43 pmIf a colleague at work made a suggestion that you disagreed with, would you say 'what a stupid comment'?
If you would, then you must work in a place where people are allowed to be disrespectful to each other. That kind of rude, condescending behaviour wouldn't be tolerated in most places I've worked. It's totally unnecessary.
Why not simply explore the issues in a climate of respect? Is it really asking that much?
Trader Pat wrote: ↑Wed Jan 20, 2021 7:39 pmI have to say though this is pretty weak. You want people moderated and spoken to for saying 'what a stupid comment'? If that's the bar that you want moderation set at then there would be no debates at all on the forum.SweetLyrics wrote: ↑Wed Jan 20, 2021 4:42 pmIf someone makes a nasty comment about another forumite, or says something unpleasant like 'what a stupid comment', I think it would be good if the comment were to be deleted and the offender spoken to.
And make it quick cos Livingston v Celtic is imminent.
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Trader Pat
- Posts: 4327
- Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2016 12:50 pm
I probably wouldn't no but there has to be a distinction made between the online world and the real world.SweetLyrics wrote: ↑Wed Jan 20, 2021 7:43 pmIf a colleague at work made a suggestion that you disagreed with, would you say 'what a stupid comment'?
If you would, then you must work in a place where people are allowed to be disrespectful to each other. That kind of rude, condescending behaviour wouldn't be tolerated in most places I've worked. It's totally unnecessary.
Why not simply explore the issues in a climate of respect? Is it really asking that much?
Like I said you were here long before me but since you're 'comeback' I've noticed you seem pretty skilled at giving as good as you get, if you were a footballer you'd be Roy Keane, make a great tackle but leave that little bit extra on your opponent. The little bit extra isn't necessary so respect can't be a one way street.
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...thank you all
I'd have been happier with a 0-0 at the Etihad, but I've traded to just shy of a 4 fig level green thus far on the EPL winner with the more important second half of the season to go, which is why I don't want City getting a head of steam up - they're too short at 1.56/1.57
I'd have been happier with a 0-0 at the Etihad, but I've traded to just shy of a 4 fig level green thus far on the EPL winner with the more important second half of the season to go, which is why I don't want City getting a head of steam up - they're too short at 1.56/1.57