My mate told me his daughters pet mouse "Elvis" was found dead earlier...
...he was caught in a trap !!
Where are all the jokes?
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wearthefoxhat
- Posts: 3552
- Joined: Sun Feb 18, 2018 9:55 am
I took part in a staring competition yesterday. It was a real eye opener.
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paspuggie48
- Posts: 737
- Joined: Thu Jun 20, 2013 9:22 am
I once went out with a ballet dancer...
I tell ya, she surely kept me on my toes !
I tell ya, she surely kept me on my toes !
was in the docs yesterday for a DRE (look it up!! 
).
As the doc took aim with his midlle finger, he coughed and said, "Now David, try not to get an erection".
Shocked, I replied, ".. my name's not David!!", to which he responded - "Yes, but mine is"... lolz!!!
). As the doc took aim with his midlle finger, he coughed and said, "Now David, try not to get an erection".
Shocked, I replied, ".. my name's not David!!", to which he responded - "Yes, but mine is"... lolz!!!
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Trader Pat
- Posts: 4327
- Joined: Tue Oct 25, 2016 12:50 pm
jimibt wrote: ↑Tue Aug 24, 2021 3:31 pmwas in the docs yesterday for a DRE (look it up!!
As the doc took aim with his midlle finger, he coughed and said, "Now David, try not to get an erection".
Shocked, I replied, ".. my name's not David!!", to which he responded - "Yes, but mine is"... lolz!!!
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Realrocknrolla
- Posts: 1910
- Joined: Fri Jun 05, 2020 7:15 pm
Almost won an acca on the Paralympics yesterday.
Lost by one leg
Lost by one leg
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firlandsfarm
- Posts: 3314
- Joined: Sat May 03, 2014 8:20 am
Realrocknrolla wrote: ↑Fri Aug 27, 2021 8:23 amAlmost won an acca on the Paralympics yesterday.
Lost by one leg
Not for Grauniad readers!!Which reminds me of favourite Valentine's Day poemRealrocknrolla wrote: ↑Fri Aug 27, 2021 8:23 amAlmost won an acca on the Paralympics yesterday.
Lost by one leg
Roses are red.
Violets are glorious
Don't try and surprise,
Oscar Pistorius
Interesting fact: the shooting actually took place on Valentine's Day
yeah, he quite literally had the world at his feet!!sniffer66 wrote: ↑Fri Aug 27, 2021 9:37 amWhich reminds me of favourite Valentine's Day poemRealrocknrolla wrote: ↑Fri Aug 27, 2021 8:23 amAlmost won an acca on the Paralympics yesterday.
Lost by one leg
Roses are red.
Violets are glorious
Don't try and surprise,
Oscar Pistorius
Interesting fact: the shooting actually took place on Valentine's Day
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paspuggie48
- Posts: 737
- Joined: Thu Jun 20, 2013 9:22 am
I told my contractor I did not want carpeted steps.
He gave me a blank stare.
He gave me a blank stare.
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paspuggie48
- Posts: 737
- Joined: Thu Jun 20, 2013 9:22 am
So if M&Ms go to university, do they become smarties?
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paspuggie48
- Posts: 737
- Joined: Thu Jun 20, 2013 9:22 am
Whoever stole my highlighters, I will find you, mark my words !
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Realrocknrolla
- Posts: 1910
- Joined: Fri Jun 05, 2020 7:15 pm
Whoever stole my Microsoft Office, I will find you. You have my word.
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wearthefoxhat
- Posts: 3552
- Joined: Sun Feb 18, 2018 9:55 am
I've recently decided to take up meditation. Beats sitting around doing nothing.