Where are all the jokes?

[Derek27]

The East of England Ambulance Service spent £54 million on a fleet of Fiat Ambulances that can't be driven by anyone over 5 feet 9 inches.

[Kai]

Women are funny like that, amirite lads

[sniffer66]

The East of England Ambulance Service spent £54 million on a fleet of Fiat Ambulances that can't be driven by anyone over 5 feet 9 inches.

So, if I had an accident 4 feet away from A&E I'd be OK ?

[alexmr2]

If Putin decides to push the button millions of Russians will invade heaven. God's applied to join NATO.

So you are saying all Russians go to heaven instead of hell when they crossover because they are all good? I don't think it's as simple as stored value nationality = Russian OR Ukranian = 1 (allowed in) as a blanket fixed rule. There has to be more conditions or perceptual judgement.

I'm sure God accounted for the possibility of lots of people going up the ladder and crossing over the crossover and designed the entry system to deal with a large volume of souls entering the afterlife at the same time. I'm sure they have developed automation or at least semi-automation by this point.

Also when Russians or Ukranian soldiers crossover into heaven I doubt their weapons will respawn with them, so it will be hard for them to to overthrow the angels unarmed in heaven which probably have their own weapons or bots to help them.

A bigger concern for me would be if Bill Gates gets into heaven.

[Hepburn]

Women are funny like that, amirite lads

1625040657730.jpeg

[sniffer66]

The pedant in me is desperately trying to type "You're".

Or ask, "My sexist what ?"

[Derek27]

If Putin decides to push the button millions of Russians will invade heaven. God's applied to join NATO.

So you are saying all Russians go to heaven instead of hell when they crossover because they are all good? I don't think it's as simple as stored value nationality = Russian OR Ukranian = 1 (allowed in) as a blanket fixed rule. There has to be more conditions or perceptual judgement.

I'm sure God accounted for the possibility of lots of people going up the ladder and crossing over the crossover and designed the entry system to deal with a large volume of souls entering the afterlife at the same time. I'm sure they have developed automation or at least semi-automation by this point.

Also when Russians or Ukranian soldiers crossover into heaven I doubt their weapons will respawn with them, so it will be hard for them to to overthrow the angels unarmed in heaven which probably have their own weapons or bots to help them.

A bigger concern for me would be if Bill Gates gets into heaven.

Just a reminder Alex, this is the jokes thread.

[Kai]

Women are funny like that, amirite lads

1625040657730.jpeg

Men are funny like that, amirite girls



#equality #ronburgundy

[alexmr2]

Women are funny like that, amirite lads

1625040657730.jpeg

Men are funny like that, amirite girls



#equality #ronburgundy

Shaun has a mansion with a garden so big he needs a digger to make a new pond - took 0 photos

Derek drives to the country club in a Range Rover to play golf and drink champagne with the local judges and councillors - took 0 photos

Peter has a Lamborghini Aventador in his garage - took 0 photos

Course seller trader went to the swimming pool on holiday - took 14 photos

... then ordered a steak and took 9 photos

[Hepburn]

Anyone want to buy a broken barometer?

No pressure.

[Derek27]

I thought of something nice to say about Boris Johnson - he's not as odious as Trump.

[Kai]

What do we want? Time travel.

When do we want it? Irrelevant.

[jimibt]

for those of a certain *generation*

deja-vu.PNG

[Euler]

Never marry a tennis fan. Love means nothing to them.

[wearthefoxhat]

My first alcoholics anonymous meeting last night was rather depressing. I left with very sobering thoughts.